Will they have his eyes?

Happy Everything

2011-12-03T14:41:00.004-05:00

The holidays are quickly approaching and I just can't believe 2011 is almost over. I can't believe my little man will be 3 on New Year's Day, and I can't believe my twins are almost 7 months old. Time has flown faster than I have ever known before. We are all adjusting to our new life as a family of five, and I'm adjusting to living that life with minimal sleep and the new dark circles under my eyes.

Not that I keep up with posts on this blog, but I think I'm going to take a semi-permanent break from it. I'm sure I have some stragglers who check in on me once in a while, so I may post some random stuff every now and then. But for the most part I will not post that much. I literally don't have enough time in a day to get the stuff done that I need to, let alone have the luxury of sitting down to my computer to type in a sane manner. LOL. I still read other blogs so you just may get a comment from me on occasion, especially those with BIG things happening in their lives right now :)

I hope you all have a wonderful and safe Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanza, and a very happy and healthy New Year!! Hugs and Love xoxo

My Snowbabies

2011-09-26T14:59:00.002-04:00

I knew this day would come sooner or later. The day when we have to decide what to do with our three remaining snowbabies. We have a few options: destroy them, donate them to science, donate them to a needing couple, keep them frozen.

We're not going to just keep them frozen. There are a few reasons for that...we do not want any more children. Three is enough for us. Plus, I cannot imagine going through another pregnancy with three kids already. I don't do pregnancy very well. I'm sure some of you remember how awful my morning sickness was.

So we can either donate them to one of two options, or destroy them. If you would have asked me before I ever had a child I would have said immediately that I'd donate them to another needing couple. I'm having a hard time with that decision right now. I now know the personalities of three (out of the nearly 50 embryos) children that I gave birth to. I can't imagine one of my little ones out there in the world without me to love and protect him/her. I certainly know they could end up with a family that loves them equally as much, but what if they don't?? What if someone causes them harm? A day wouldn't go by without me thinking about them and worrying where they are and who they have become. I would love to hear your opinions on this as we need to make our decision soon and I'm still torn as to what the best decision is for us.

A glimpse of our summer

2011-09-07T16:31:00.002-04:00

It's been quite some time since I posted last so I thought I should write a little update. In most recent news, we had the twins baptized two weekends ago. It was just my family at the Baptism, so it was very personal. Another good thing about it being just my family was that I wasn't too embarrassed when EJ started running around (he literally ran around the entire church...like ten times...screaming and having a ball). My brother and his wife are godparents to Jillian; Ed's sister and her husband are godparents to Jacob. My other brother and his wife are EJ's godparents so they were there as well, along with our parents. It was the day after Hurricane Irene so a lot of our family and friends couldn't make it to the party, but that just meant more cake for me :)Here we are...I'm holding EJ with his t-rex c.rocs on...

The rest of our summer has been pretty good. With the help of my parents and SIL we get through each day and everyone gets dressed and fed. LOL. EJ spent a lot of time swimming, which he loves, and hanging out with his favorite cousins. Jillian is sleeping between 8-10 hours every night. Jake usually wakes once or twice, but I'm still able to feel well-rested most mornings. My days are busy. VERY busy. My weeks fly by and I wish it would all slow down a bit. I'm eager to get to the STTN phase for both twins, but at the same time I don't want to rush things too much.EJ starts "pre-school" next week. It's just two hours one day a week, but I think it will be good for him. I can't wait to see all the wonderful artwork he brings home to hang on the fridge.Hopefully it won't be another 3 months before I update again :D

Sleep (or lack of)

2011-06-01T16:34:00.002-04:00

Haven't had much of it lately. At least not more than 30 minutes at a time.
Desperately need some. My eyes have never been so droopy.
Just an hour to two of solid sleep would do me a world of good.
Can't seem to put two thoughts together or concentrate on anything. I must seem like a space cadet to anyone talking to me.

We're all doing ok!!

2011-05-23T15:15:00.004-04:00

There hasn't been as much sleep as I'd like, but we're all hanging in there :) The twins are great eaters, and pretty good sleepers. However, they're not totally on the same schedule so we're awake often through the night nursing/giving bottles. I don't feel as exhausted as I did with EJ; I guess I've gotten used to running on limited sleep. I really don't know how well we would have handled having the twins before our singleton, so I'm glad it worked out the way it did with them coming after EJ.

Someone asked me if either Jake or Jillian has their Daddy's eyes (in regards to the title of this blog)...well, without a doubt Jillian does. It's so neat to look at them looking at each other with the exact same shape of eyes. It will be interesting to see in a few months if she has the same color as he has too.

I wish I had more time to take pictures, but I snap one whenever I can with my cell phone. Here's one with Jake on the left and Jillian on the right. Oh, and we've taken to calling her "Jilly" which really seems to make EJ giggle :)

The Twins are here!!!

2011-05-18T18:11:00.001-04:00

I don't have much time to type, so here are the basics...

The twins arrived on Thursday May 12th, which is their Daddy's birthday :)

Jillian Lyn - 8:14am - 5lbs 1oz, 18.25inches
Jacob Francis - 8:16am - 6lbs 3oz, 19.5 inches

They're doing great...no time was needed in the NICU!!!!! I'll post pics as soon as I load them to my computer.

EJ is doing fantastic with them. He hugs them and gets upset if they cry...such a good protector already :)

Full Term - WE MADE IT!!!

2011-05-08T11:49:00.004-04:00

I'm am beyond-words-excited that our little twins made it to full term...36 weeks as of yesterday! I was told at the very beginning of this pregnancy that 50% of twins don't make it this far, so we were certainly preparing for them to come before today.

I had a growth scan on Thursday and Jillian (back to loving that name) was measuring small at 4lbs 7oz which is under the 10th percentile. Jake is 5lbs 7oz and growing very well. EJ was delivered at 5lbs 6oz so it seems they're similar in size at this point. The doctor recommended that we deliver this week to give Jillian the best chance to thrive on her own in the outside world. If we make it until then, I'll have my repeat c-section on Thursday May 12th, which just so happens to be my wonderful husband's birthday too :)

The doctor also ordered twice weekly NST's so I went for another one this past Friday. The protein in my urine was at +2 and I'm officially dealing with pre-eclampsia (just like with EJ). My peri said my bloodwork didn't come back "perfect" but levels weren't "alarming" either. I will go for another tomorrow (Monday) and then take it day by day until Thursday. We want to give the little girl as much of a chance as possible to reach 5lbs at the time of birth. Apparently that is the magic number for the NICU as well as the car seat limit. Come on little girl...GROW!!!!!

L&D #5...aka The Girl Who Cried Wolf

2011-04-27T15:19:00.002-04:00

First off, today is my 33rd birthday. Happy Birthday to me :D

I went for a mani and pedi this morning, then out to lunch, and finally took a nice long nap. That nap was needed after last night...

I started having consistent contractions around 6pm. I timed them for over an hour and I had once every 4-6 minutes. I called my peri and she had me head to L&D...this could be it! I got all hooked up to the monitors and the babies sounded great and we could see my contractions coming quickly. They weren't very intense, but they were constant. My regular appt was that afternoon and I was dilated to 1cm, and I was the same in L&D that evening. So after two hours of being monitored, and no change in my cervix, I was sent home. What a let down. We really thought that was going to be it and my twins could be delivered on my birthday. Oh well.

They're doing great and I can't believe how far I've made it in this pregnancy! My blood pressure has been great, and no protein in my urine. Looks like we may get a few more weeks before their arrival.

Oh, and we have a date set...if they don't come before then, my c-section is set for Tuesday, May 24th. I love having a date in my head as my "due date" and know that is the longest I'll have to hold on to the twins. They are getting heavier every day and I literally feel every ounce they gain. My body is not my own and my stomach often looks like two pigs fighting under a blanket, each going a different direction. Haha. I've gained almost 40lbs at this point and my belly is measuring 55cm (should only be 34cm with a singleton). As my husband so eloquently put it, I am "ridiculously huge". Thanks babe, I appreciate that. LOL.

33w 3d - belly pic

2011-04-19T11:34:00.002-04:00

So it's a good thing I have seen the babies on ultrasound or else I would swear I was carrying a hippo!!!

This is what I looked like with EJ at 33 weeks.

L&D Trip #4 at 33 weeks

2011-04-16T13:38:00.002-04:00

This time my trip to L&D was a bit more serious, but I'm still pregnant so all is good...

Thursday night around 11:30 I started having some contractions. My pain level was around a 4, which is the most painful they've been so far. After two or three I realized that they were kind of close together so I started timing them. They were only TEN minutes apart and very regular. The intensity/pain would vary but it was a constant every ten minute event. This went on for a few hours. I kept debating whether or not I should call the doctor. Some didn't seem so bad, and it was the middle of the night, so I put it off as long as I could hoping they'd slow down.

It turned 3:30 and it was still every ten minutes, and the pain was growing so I caved and called my peri. I got the answering service, but my doctor called me back in like three minutes. I explained it all to her and she told me to get my tush in there. I called my Mom to take me to the hospital (Ed stayed home with a sleeping EJ because he had to work on Friday). I really figured it would be like my normal trips and they'd monitor me for an hour and then send me home.

It was actually a bit different.

As soon as they hooked me up we could see the twins had great heart rates and movements (I was feeling them move all along so I wasn't worried about that). My contractions were actually more frequent than I even felt and a lot strong in intensity. The arcs on the graphs were at the top of the screen and coming every few minutes. They gave me an IV, had me pee in a cup and drew blood. I was there for about three hours when my tests came back normal and my contractions grew farther apart and less intense. Apparently I was dehydrated so I've been ordered to drink 3 liters of water a day. YIKES. How many times will I pee if I drink that much?!? Haha.

My Mom and I got home around 7:30 am and we were both exhausted. I hadn't slept a wink all night. I spent the day relaxing, but I was still contracting and in some pain. We're praying our little twinfants stay put for at least two more weeks (3-4 is ideal) but we're starting to see that might not happen. I've been switched from Lovenox to Heparin as one more preparation/precaution in case I go preterm.

Every day I stay pregnant is a great thing so we're living one day at a time now and I'm resting as much as I possibly can so my body doesn't go into labor any sooner than necessary.

32w 3d - NST

2011-04-12T15:42:00.002-04:00

My NST took almost three hours today. It took soooo long to get both babies on the monitors at the same time, and then stay on for half an hour. In the end, they both look awesome and I'll go back for another NST next week.

I also had an appt with my peri this morning. She told me they won't let me go any longer than 38 weeks so that means I have only 5 and half weeks left to go. I think we're all ready with baby gear, so now I just have to wrap my head around the fact that I'll be bringing TWO babies home (Yes, I've been PG for months and yet it still amazes me that I'm carrying twins).

EJ has no idea how much his life it about to change. He is my little rockstar and I will do everything in my power for him to stay as happy a little guy as he is :)

32-week Growth Scan

2011-04-11T11:35:00.002-04:00

This is going to be short and sweet...

The twins are doing awesome. Madelyn is up to 3lbs 10oz and Jake is 4lbs 3oz. They are only 14% apart in weight so they're both thriving :)

I start weekly NST's tomorrow and I'm praying my blood pressure behaves!!!!

L&D Trip #3 at 31 weeks

2011-04-04T11:26:00.002-04:00

Just when I think things are going smoothly, I end up in L&D for a few hours.

Yesterday afternoon around 4pm I started feeling some contractions. There was no pain with them, but they were every 10-15 minutes for about two hours. Ed finally said it was time to call my peri. After describing the feelings to her, she told me to head straight to the hospital. They kept me hooked up to the monitors for a few hours and saw that I was having small contractions every few minutes (more than I even felt). The babies looked great - awesome heart rates and lots of movement. I was checked and my cervix is not dialated, and it's long and posterior. Since there was no dilation, I was sent home with orders to take it easy even more than I already am (I'm already on modified bedrest).

I'm praying we make it five more weeks so we can hopefully avoid a stay in the NICU. I'm getting very worried that we may not make it that far. My hospital bag is packed but I hope it gets a nice layer of dust sitting in the corner of my bedroom before we need it. LOL.

L&D Trip #2

2011-03-14T16:29:00.003-04:00

Friday night turned out to be more eventful than I originally had planned. Around 3pm I started having a horrible pain in my lower abdomen. I also had a lot of pressure behind my pelvic bone and seriously thought the twins were coming then. Ed was at work so I called my Mom to get a ride to the hospital. I could barely stand, let alone drive a car. My Dad was off that day so he took me while my Mom stayed home with a napping EJ. Ed was in the lobby by the time we arrived and he wheeled me up to Labor & Delivery.

They immediately hooked me up and got great heartbeats and movements from both twins. I wasn't contracting either. The pain was from something else. It took my breath away it was so bad. They did a bunch of blood work to rule out many things (including an abruption and appendicitis). They finally gave me a shot of morphine and in 20 minutes the pain was subsiding and my head was very woozy. This was almost 7pm so I had been in that pain for about 3 hours. I was exhausted. They wanted to keep an eye on me so I spent the night there. The morphine helped me get one of the best night's sleep I'd had in months :) I had a few contractions during my stay, but nothing worrisome so I went home first thing in the morning.

I'm now on modified bed rest. I get an hour in the morning to wash and dress myself and EJ and get us breakfast. I should then be a couch potato as much of the day as I can. My Mom and SIL are around a lot to help with EJ and let me rest with my feet up. I'm also supposed to stay strictly on the couch after dinner when Ed is home. It's difficult, but I'm so tired most of the time that I don't put up too much of a fight. LOL. I get out of breath very easily and the twins are SO heavy in my belly that it's exhausting to walk around too much.

Hopefully the next two months will be calm and they continue to grow as well as they have been so far.

27w 6d - Growth Scan

2011-03-11T09:09:00.002-05:00

I had another growth scan yesterday and the twins are doing really well. Madelyn (we changed our minds from Jillian to Madelyn) is 2lbs 6oz (50%) and Jake is 3lbs (75%). Most times you hear of twins who are born so tiny so it's reassuring to hear our little girl is right on track and our boy is so big. Now, if they'll just bake long enough to keep that growth going! It's crazy to think their total weight (5lbs 6oz) is what EJ was born at. With the added weight of an extra placenta and other stuff, no wonder my belly has been feeling so HEAVY lately!

It's hard to explain just how tired I've been. Exhausted. Physically wiped out. My body wants to turn itself off after dinner. Ed has been great at taking over all EJ duties when he gets home from work. That gives me a chance to put my (swollen) feet up and rest a little while.

We're getting the cribs put together and the room decorated, but it's going a bit slowly since I can't do much at once. I also want to get my hospital bag packed just in case. I waited too long to do that with EJ and I rushed to pack my bag after an NST that confirmed I'd go in for an induction that night. I don't want to be that unprepared this time. Being in control and preparing for the twins is helping me keep sane. I can't do much of the actual physical stuff, so if I'm organized enough with my lists, Ed can get done all that is necessary. I can't wait to have my body back - I HATE not being able to do things for myself.

L&D Trip #1

2011-03-06T16:06:00.002-05:00

Late Friday afternoon I started having a bit of pain/pressure in the lower left side of my abdomen. The feeling would come and go, but it wasn't like a contraction. It lasted for an hour or so and when Ed got home from work he made me call my peri. She had me head straight to L&D so I could have a non-stress test (NST). I had a bunch of them with EJ so I knew what to expect. They hooked me up and found both babies' heartbeats right away.

Everything looked great with the babies and they confirmed I wasn't contracting. They tested my urine and said there were some good things and some bad things: tiny bit of protein, red and white blood cell counts were appropriate, and I think she said there were some ketones (???). But all in all, it looked fine. We never really found out what was wrong, but I was relieved enough to know it wasn't the twins. The pain lasted on and off Friday night and it was totally gone when I woke up Saturday morning. Just one of those freaky things that caused some excitement on an otherwise boring Friday night. LOL.

26w 4d - Third Tri!!

2011-03-02T13:24:00.002-05:00

Everything is still going smoothly with this pregnancy. I had a check-up with my peri yesterday and my blood pressure is awesome - 114/72. My weight is good (although I disagree lol). I've gained about 25 lbs so far (only 22lbs total with EJ). But my Dr is very happy with my progress :)

We're getting settled nicely into our new house. This weekend we'll put the twins' cribs together and get their room organized. I need to make a list of all the stuff we still need, but I've ordered the double stroller and another infant car seat. It's funny to think of everything I saved from EJ and yet since we're having twins I still need to get a second of a lot of things...crib mattress, bouncer for feedings, PINK blankets (yay!!!!), etc.

EJ is doing great. He still has no clue that babies are coming and I have no idea what he'll do when he sees them. He's never been around a small baby since he was one.

I still miss Jimmy every day. Life is certainly easier with one less body to keep after, but I still feel like a part of my family is missing :( I hope the sadness lessens over time.

I go a week from tomorrow for another growth scan, and then I think I'll start them every other week instead of once a month. My peri already started my appts every other week, and she said that may be once or twice until they move me to every week. It all depends on how well things continue to progress. I don't mind going in that often, it's just more difficult having to ask my Mom to watch him so often. Oh and my Dad is retiring at the end of this month so it will be wonderful to have them both around and eager to help. I really am lucky to have such great parents :) I don't know how I would handle all of this without them!

NBR: A sad day in my house

2011-02-12T14:21:00.005-05:00

First let me say no to worry, the twins are doing great. We had my 24-week growth scan the other day and they're both growing perfectly! Jake is 1 lb 7 oz and Jillian is 1 lb 5 oz. They're only 8% in size apart and the Dr. likes to see anything below 20%. So they're awesome.

I'm so sad for another reason. We had to re-home our dog Jimmy. He has never been a fan of EJ and it's just getting worse as EJ is looking play more and more. It's something I've been thinking about for well over a year (when EJ started crawling after Jimmy) and lately it's become obvious that was the best choice for our family. There are so many factors that went into this and I'm too sad to talk about them now. As we speak, Ed is delivering Jimmy to his new home. It's a perfect fit and if I could have my pick of any family, they would be it. I found them through the Basenji Rescue that I used to volunteer and foster. I have thought long and hard about this decision and weighed all of our options. In the end, I want Jimmy to be happy and he deserves a life that he's excited about...not just hiding from a running toddler. Many many tears have been shed even though I know it's for the best.

I will always remember and love my sweat pea.

We moved!

2011-02-07T08:21:00.002-05:00

The move was a catastrophe. We were supposed to go to settlement on Friday 1/28, but didn't make it until Wed. 2/2. The week in between we spent living at my parents' house. They didn't mind one bit (they loved having EJ there) but it was so so so stressful. We lived day by day wondering when settlement would be. There was a paperwork error that delayed things and nobody could tell us how long it would take to fix. And to add insult to injury, we were all sick. I started out sick, then got EJ sick, and then we got my Mom sick. It was terrible and we were all miserable for a few days.

But now we're all moved in and unpacking boxes every day. It's totally overwhelming how much stuff we own. Most of it could probably go to Goodwill, and it just might if the babies decide to come before we're all unpacked. LOL.

The twins are doing great. Moving around more and more each day. They seem to wake up just as I'm going to bed. It's so awesome to feel them moving around. EJ is doing well with adjusting to the new house. We've quickly settled into our old routines and he's found almost all of his toys, which makes him even happier. Jimmy is still adjusting. He's had a few accidents (but that could be because we don't have a fenced yard yet and he's not outside as much as he's used to).

All in all we survived the stress of moving so now life can continue on for us. Next step is to get the twins' room ready. I'm thinking they'll share a room in the beginning. If you have twins, or know someone who does, how did you handle their sleeping arrangements?

21w 3d

2011-01-25T22:16:00.003-05:00

First off, my big ultrasound went awesome. My little ones are measuring perfectly (even a few days ahead). And our Jake is about 25mg heavier than Jillian (still going with those names for now). We also got re-confirmation that they are a boy and a girl, and we got a great under-the-butt shot of Jake which we should save to show his future wife. LOL.

I've been sick with the flu for five days now and I've been miserable. I haven't had any good drugs to take so I'm just kinda suffering through it. I finally see the light at the end of the tunnel, and I'm just praying EJ and Ed don't end up with it. I was super fortunate that my Mom and SIL watched EJ so much for me so I could rest.

Oh, and all this coughing has catapulted me into new territory...I now wear Depends. Yup, those pad/underwear things for older women who can't control their bladders. That is me. My little girl has set up camp on my bladder and there is no amount of kegel exercises I can do to hold the pee in while I'm in a coughing fit. I've given up trying, so I'm embracing Depends. They're a little uncomfortable, but they stay much drier than expected. No more changing pads/underwear/pants four times a day for me. :-/

We move this coming weekend, and Ed has done an amazing job packing up the whole house basically by himself. I can't wait to get settled as I'm tired of living out of boxes.

EJ got his first Big Boy Haircut the other day. He screamed bloody murder the whole time, but boy does he look handsome! I haven't gotten a good picture since I've been sick but I will post as soon as I do.

Hope you're all doing well :)

18w 6d

2011-01-07T22:39:00.002-05:00

I can't believe how bad I've been at blogging this pregnancy (and about EJ and my life in general). It never ceases to amaze me how quickly times flies and how little I seem to get done (laundry, getting my haircut, anything really).

Let's see if I can recap:

We've sold our house and bought a new one. We haven't moved yet - that will be the weekend of Jan. 28/29/30. We found a bigger home to house our growing family, and let's just hope we can afford it all :)

This pregnancy is getting physically easier in some respects. I'm not nearly as nauseous (knock on wood) and the exhaustion has lightened up a bit. My belly is pretty big. I think I'm as big as I was at around 24 weeks with EJ. I can't believe I'm at the halfway point. I have my BIG ultrasound on Thursday 1/13. Even though we already know we're having a boy and a girl, it will still be exciting to see them. I'm praying all of their parts looks just as they should and that they cooperate so the u/s tech can get all the proper measurements.

EJ turned TWO on New Year's Day. I cannot fathom how he's been with me for two years already. And yet, I can't imagine what my life was like without him. He's handsome and hilarious and he loves me more than anything...well, except Oreos. Haha.

I think that's it in a nutshell. I will post after my u/s on Thursday and hopefully I'll have some good pictures to share too. And speaking of the twins...what do you all think of the names Jacob and Jillian? Their full names would be Jacob Edward (DH is Ed) and Jillian Lynne (My Mom is Lynda). What do you think of the J and J thing??? And is it silly that they'd be "Jake and Jill". Haha - just things family/friends have pointed out to me.

Here is a picture of them taken on 12/20. Our little man is on the left and our girl is on the right. Sorry it's not a great photo. I took a picture of the u/s with my phone.

Stupid is as stupid does.

2010-12-27T22:37:00.003-05:00

We told DH's family on Christmas night that we are having a boy and a girl. They were all thrilled, but above the happiness the following is what I remember most. Let me preface this with the fact that my BIL is a very intelligent man. He's an engineer with a few degrees, but is apparently only "book smart".

And Dandle, this of course made me think of you. LOL.

BIL: Wow, a boy and a girl. That's awesome.
Me: It's just what we were hoping for.
BIL: Will they be able to tell if they're fraternal or identical twins?
Me: Well, since they're not the same gender, they're obviously fraternal.
BIL: But they could still be identical twins, right?
Me: Ummm, well, not by definition. We know they're fraternal.
BIL: But what if they look alike?? Would they be identical twins then?
Me: ....walking away laughing...

I still crack up when I think of how serious he was about it. For a moment I thought he was joking, but he wasn't at all. LMAO.

16w 2d Growth Scan

2010-12-20T13:40:00.003-05:00

Since I'm having twins I'm lucky enough to get a detailed u/s (growth scan) every four weeks. Today went great. The babies are each measuring about 6 ounces, which puts them a little head, and shows that they're growing at the same rate (awesome!!). We also got some more great news...we found out their genders!!!

Add us to team PURPLE...baby A is a GIRL and baby B is a BOY!!!!!!!

Busting Out

2010-12-05T22:35:00.003-05:00

Literally.
I'm now a 38DDD.
Wowza.
And I'm just past 14 weeks.
I've already passed the size I was when I was nursing EJ.
How big will my bust get by the time I deliver the twins??
Will I get even bigger after that when my milk comes in???
Will I even be able so see over my boobs???? LOL.

2nd Trimester

2010-12-02T08:40:00.001-05:00

Yesterday was 13w4d and officially the start of my second trimester. I've let out a little sigh of relief of my breath I've been holding for the past three months. Still a long way to go, but so thrilled to have made it this far with my twins ♥!

NT Scan

2010-11-29T15:17:00.003-05:00

My NT Scan was last week and it went great. First off, the important part...the NT measurements for the twins were 1.8 and 1.4. So as long as the bloodwork comes back ok we seem to have a low risk of any abnormalities. I will go again next month for another bloodwork check to be sure there is no heightened risk. **Fingers crossed**

The scan lasted about an hour and I got a great look at the two babies. They are lying on top of each other - head to head - so it's like they're in bunk beds. Very cute :) The baby on top (baby B) was moving around so much and the bottom baby (baby A) was a lot calmer...we'll see if that holds true after they're born. LOL.

The u/s tech also turned on the 3D probe for a few minutes and I got a great picture of baby B's body and awesome shot of baby A's face. It's amazing to think that even with them being sooo tiny right now, they already are little people.

Tomorrow I have another check-up with my OB and I'll have another u/s then. I will get one at each visit since they want to be sure both heartbeats are going strong. I guess it's hard to differentiate the two with just a doppler.

EJ is great. We put up our Christmas tree this weekend and so far he hasn't fussed with it. I didn't want to get involved with the constant "no touch" of the ornaments, so we put them on the top half of the tree only. The lights go all the way down and he hasn't seemed too interested in them. We'll see how the next month goes. It's fun thinking of all the gifts Santa will bring him. He'll be two on NY's Day so he's at an age for the really fun toys like Mr. Potato Head and Sit n' Spin. All the good stuff we remember playing with as kids. I have a feeling we're going to go overboard at the toy store :D

BFP for a friend!

2010-11-23T17:45:00.002-05:00

A friend of mine who has suffered many m/c's just did her first round of IVF. They did PGD to try to eliminate any more m/c's by picking the perfect little embryos. They transferred two GIRL embabies and her first beta came back at 98 at 13 dper. Beta two had a doubling time of 40 hours so she's very hopeful that this BFP will stick. She won't go for her first u/s until 12/6 (seems kinda late to me) but for now she's knocked up :D

BFN for SIL

2010-11-19T21:59:00.002-05:00

I posted about two weeks ago that my SIL was doing her first IVF. They have a daughter already, but "only" needed the help of Clomid then. Anyway...they retrieved 41 eggs from her, 24 of which fertilized (without ICSI). They transferred two and froze three. And she had her beta today which was a BFN. I feel so sad for her and them. They were OOP for everything but the meds, so the money issue adds another level of suckiness to this.

I can't help but dwell on her percentages. If my math is right, she had a fert rate of only like 60%. And of those 24, only 5 made it to the blast stage. Another sucky percentage of about 20%. I'm not an expert on that phase of IVF, but am I right to think it's an egg quality issue? She's 36 and her RE told her that her age is against her, but I would have thought her chances would have been better.

In a few days when the BFN isn't so raw, I'm sure she'll have questions for me on what could have gone wrong. Not sure if she'll have a WTF appt with her RE or when that would be. But I'd like to have some guidance for her and to help with an answer or two in the meantime.

She'll be traveling to see her family for two weeks around Christmas, so I'm guessing they won't even think about doing an FET until the new year. I'm just glad they have snowbabies, because in the begging she said they weren't going to freeze any. It's just so hard to believe that out of 41 eggs retrieved, they only got 5 viable blasts. God I wish IVF was more of a guarantee.

In my news...I'm trucking along. Still quite nauseous, but I actually have good days sprinkled in between my yucky days. I'm enjoying eating everything I can, and two of it all saying "one for each baby!". LOL.

My NT scan is on Wed so I will be sure to post results afterward. Say a little prayer that everything is ok with my two little ones ♥.

9w 5d

2010-11-04T17:39:00.003-04:00

I can't believe it's been 2 weeks since my last post. Time flies when you spend your days puking :)

Everything is just perfect with the twins. I had my first OB appt today and we saw them both dancing around in there (they get their moves from their mommy). I'm getting sick at least once a day, but it's usually more. I've stopped the PNV's for a few weeks, and the Zofran is long-gone, so my constipation is going away. It's not normal yet, but at least we're heading in the right direction.

EJ is getting more active by the day and I'm getting more exhausted every day. I'm not sleeping well at night, but at least I don't feel sick when I lay down in bed. We're doing a lot more "big kid" things with EJ like coloring, play doh, etc. Those are the times I sit on the floor next to his little table and enjoy the "stillness". LOL.

I'm so lucky to have my Mom close by as she is a constant help when I'm just too sick to get off the couch (or out of the bathroom). She's all fun and games so EJ giggles and runs to the door just at the mention of "Mom-Mom". She's so wonderful to him...and the cookies & chocolate chip pancakes she makes are an added bonus to a 22-month old.

My SIL just had her ER yesterday...47 eggs! Holy sh!!t right? 24 fertilized and they're hoping to do a day 5 transfer on Monday. I really wish I could help her out more with watching my niece, but again my Mom is there to help out. My Mom is going to deserve a vacation very soon. Many days she'll have both kids at once since our appts always seem to fall at the same time. It's great how EJ and his cousin get along, but I'm sure my Mom would also enjoy sipping coffee and watching her soap operas. Haha. I swear I don't know what I would do if she wasn't retired!

Oh well, off to read some books to my little man :D

7w 5d

2010-10-21T21:56:00.002-04:00

Everything went perfectly at our weekly appt today. I was told we'll "graduate" next week so everyone keep your fingers crossed the twins still look amazing in a week. Then I'll be headed to my high risk OB.

No "movement" to speak of yet. Still passing just a little bit here and there but nothing to give much relief. My nausea is still here full force and just for shits and giggles, we've added heartburn to the mix. It's a real party in my body right now.

And I'm convinced at least one of the babies is a girl. I don't have that healthy pregnancy "glow" that I had with EJ. Old wives' tales say that a baby girl drains your beauty and by looking in the mirror I am certain that's that case.

Well, I'm off to bed. But first I have to do my Lovenox injection, take some various pills and down a tablespoon of mineral oil. Sweet dreams, ladies xoxo.

Mineral Oil = FAIL

2010-10-20T09:18:00.003-04:00

I have an appt this morning with a GI specialist because my RE believes I'm impacted. Hello? I told him that about a week ago.

Things I've tried:
MANY various foods that normally do the trick.
Enemas
Glycerin suppositories
Milk of magnesia
Prescription laxative
Mineral Oil

And none of that has produced anything more than like 6 tiny little hard rabbit pellets. Ugh.

Full of shit.

2010-10-19T14:51:00.002-04:00

*Warning - this post is going to cover some very yucky topics. And before my certain readers get their panties in a bunch and say I'm ungrateful and I should just be happy to be pregnant...well, that's just a load of crap. (wink wink).

I have not pooped since Oct. 2 (or even before then). I had the same constipation issues with EJ, but it seems even more severe now. I started Zofran for the nausea, but had to stop that because it can cause constipation. I have, however, purchased a PrimaBella band which seems to work really well. I've also stopped my PNV's for now until I have a bowel movement. I've been to Urgent Care and the ER and all they've done is given me strong laxatives that haven't worked yet. I've tried prunes, pepperoni pizza, apples, apple cider, Ta.co Be.ll and McDon.alds and nothing has worked. My belly is so distended I look about 5 months pregnant. I think I need to be disemboweled (is that what it's called???). Yuck.

My nausea is out of control because the food I eat has nowhere to go. It's piling up higher and higher and even comes back up half the time. My gag reflex is super-sensitive and the slightest odors make me puke. Changing EJ's diapers is a real challenge. I usually put peppermint lotion under my nose to help cover the smell of his pooh. That doesn't always work and I'm often found running to the bathroom to get sick.

I want so badly to have a nice decent bowel movement so if there is anything else I can try, please suggest it!!!!!

Great appt today - 5w 5d

2010-10-07T21:50:00.004-04:00

Everything looked great at my u/s today. Ed went with me so he could see (with me for the first time) our two little ones with heartbeats thumping away! I just love those little flickers :)

I was told, however, that twins bring an increased risk for GD. So my RE said to limit my carbs and ice cream. WHAT?!?!?! That is seriously all I want to eat these days. So he said I could have them for breakfast and lunch, but try to avoid them for dinner. And I don't care what anyone says, I'm taking that to mean I can have a sundae for breakfast :D

My nausea is still out of control, so I got my script for Zofran. My RE said it was scary that I asked for it by name. I told him I've been around that block before and I know what I need. LOL. He also told me that a generic PNV wouldn't do since I'm having twins and need double the Folic Acid. So now I'm buying the "good" stuff at $65 a month. Ouch. Hopefully we'll hit our deductible soon and they'll be covered for the rest of my pregnancy since our insurance year ends July 31.

My list of meds I'm currently on:
Estradiol - 2x daily
Zofran - 3x daily (drop to 2x when needed)
PIO - AM shot
PNV - at bedtime
Folic Acid - 2x daily
Lovenox - AM shot
Baby aspirin - at bedtime
Colace - 1-3x daily as needed.

Here is today's picture (sorry it's a little dark and hard to see). One of you ladies once said that they look like diamond rings at this point, and I think you're so right! They're pretty symmetrical a this point, which I'm told is a good thing.

Hello, Old Friend

2010-10-04T15:35:00.003-04:00

Morning Sickness has arrived. Blech.

It started with EJ around week 7, so it's almost 2 weeks ahead of schedule with the twins. As long as I'm actually eating food I feel ok. Let's see how many pounds I can gain in one week. LOL.

I still have brown spotting most of the time. Not sure if it's blood or possibly just tinted brown from BV (Bacterial Vaginosis). Lovely, right? My RE is going to check me for that at my appt this Thursday.

On a lighter topic...When EJ was in utero we called him "Peanut". Right now we call the babies "The Twins" but I'm trying to think of something a little cuter. Any ideas??

Double Trouble

2010-09-30T13:24:00.003-04:00

My u/s was this morning and Lisa was right...I'm having TWINS!!! There are two perfect little gestational sacs. The u/s tech said she could see one of the yolk sacs and the other was a little faint to see. She was surprised to see either since I'm only 4w5d. I go back in a week and we're hoping to see heartbeats then.

Here's a picture of my little ones...

Appt tomorrow

2010-09-29T21:54:00.002-04:00

Beta #3 will be tomorrow morning. Not only that, but I'll have an u/s where I'll hopefully be able to see a gestational sac. If Lisa (MeInsideOut) was a betting woman, I think she'd say that I'll see TWO sacs based on my first two betas. Will she be right????

Love it.

2010-09-27T17:04:00.002-04:00

This was posted on the mirror in the bathroom of my RE's office.

Beta #2

2010-09-24T15:46:00.004-04:00

Beta #1 on Monday was 90. Today (4 days later) my RE said he's looking for anything over 300. My beta came back at 621. That's a doubling time of about 34.5 hours. Wahoo!!!!! Still knocked up :)

My lining looks great at 14.9mm and I go back on Thursday when we'll hopefully be able to see a sac on the u/s.

I've been having a ton of "pinching" on either side of my abdomen. The nurse said that's normal and it's just my ovaries shrinking down from when the emptied follies filled up with fluid/blood after the retrieval (or something like that). As long as she says it's normal, that's all I care about. LOL.

Beta #2 later today

2010-09-24T08:38:00.002-04:00

I either have morning sickness or my nerves are getting the best of me. I'm gagging just thinking about brushing my teeth.

I've had some brown spotting for the past few days and it's making me so nervous. We're hoping to see a beta over 360. And I have about 6 hours until I'll get the phone call with the results. I'm just about 4 weeks so I'm sure we won't see anything on the u/s so I won't know anything for sure until that phone call comes in.

Fingers crossed!

Right on schedule

2010-09-22T06:45:00.003-04:00

It's a pattern. I get a BFP and a few days later I start to spot. It may be over before it even begins.

Everything will be fine.
Everything will be fine.
Everything will be FINE.

Beta #1

2010-09-20T20:45:00.002-04:00

11dper - beta = 90
That seems a bit high, but we'll see how it goes from here. Next beta will be this Friday.

STICK***STICK***STICK

POAS day - 11dper

2010-09-20T06:56:00.003-04:00

A picture is worth a thousand words. Thank goodness, because I'm speechless :)

No squinting needed. No twisting funny under the bright bathroom lights. I can clearly see a plus sign from about three feet away. There it is -- a BFP.

First baby picture

2010-09-15T10:46:00.005-04:00

Here are the two hatching blasts we transferred yesterday. The second picture shows all 7 embryos that we have...still waiting to hear how many of the 5 made it to the freezer.

I'm knocked up...at least for the next week ;)

2010-09-14T10:00:00.002-04:00

My ET was this morning and it went off without a hitch. We transferred two perfect hatching blasts. I'll post a picture as soon as I'm allowed upstairs to scan it in. There are two remaining blasts and three morulas (is that what they're called??) in the dish. They'll let me know tomorrow which of those five made it to the freezer.

I'm ordered to be on bedrest with bathroom privileges for 24 hours. My Mom has EJ for the rest of today and he's sleeping there tonight. Ed is going back to work soon so I'll have the rest of the day to chill on the couch with Days of Our Lives and movies. Oooh maybe I can find some Desperate Housewives too! It's so quiet here I don't know what to do with myself. Jimmy is even ignoring me to go bask in the sun on the deck. Oh well, I'll enjoy my alone time while I can :)

My next appt is Monday 9/20 for a hormone check and then Monday 9/27 is the HCG. I'm going to let yall know right now that I'll be testing before 9/27. I may do it on 9/20 since that will be 11 dper. Or maybe I'll at least wait until 9/21 so it's 12 dper. My SIL had an IUI last Tuesday and her test day is 9/21, which is also her birthday. Wouldn't it be a piss if we both got BFP's that day?? Wouldn't it be an even bigger piss if we both got BFN's???? Only time will tell.

Well, I'm off to watch a little Let's Make a Deal. Hope everyone is having a great day!

ET date set

2010-09-13T11:30:00.001-04:00

My transfer will be Tuesday 9/14. I'm not yet sure of the time, but it will be in the morning. I'll post when I get home tomorrow :)

Fert Report

2010-09-10T08:15:00.002-04:00

10 eggs retrieved.
All were ICSI'd.
9 fertilized.
7 embryos remain growing.

Obviously, more would have been better. But I don't feel too bad (physically) right now and after IVF #2 when I had 25 retrieved I was in a ton of pain.

We're torn on whether we want to transfer 2 or 3. But I guess we ultimately won't be able to make that decision until we hear how many continue to go until transfer day. That will be either Sunday or Tuesday.

I'm a Craps player and usually root against unlucky number 7, but here I am cheering for my Lucky Little Seven!!!

ER date set

2010-09-07T18:07:00.003-04:00

The past two weeks have just flown by. I planned on doing posts updating my stimming and the side effects. All of a sudden the past 9 days are gone and I'm going to trigger tonight for my ER on Thursday.

I have about a dozen follies in my right ovary and about half that in my left side...my leftie never did keep up with my righty. I've been pretty tired the past week (I think that's from the Lupron) and I swear I look 3 months pregnant. My belly seemed to have popped when I started the Menopur a few days ago. I'm kinda bloated too. Other than those few things, the side effects have been minimal.

This time around is a lot less intimidating than before I had EJ. I even went to bed one night and got all comfy before I realized I didn't do my night time injections. That never would have happened three years ago. My world revolved around my cycles back then. Now, my world revolves around getting enough sleep. LOL.

At 10:30 tonight (I set my alarm to be sure I didn't fall asleep or forget) I take my Novarel trigger shot. I have to be at my RE's office at 11am Thursday morning.

I have been very lucky that my Mom has been able to watch EJ for all of my appts. I would feel very awkward bringing him. There are a few signs asking not to bring children whenever possible and I'd hate to make anyone feel uncomfortable. I've been on the other end of that and it sucks to see kids where you least expect it..

My SIL did her first IUI today. She already has a daughter 3 months younger than EJ, but got PG then with only Clomid. If this works for her and my IVF works, our due dates will be two days apart. So, both sets of our kids will be the same age. I think it will be great for them to grow up together.

I guess that's it for now. I will post my ER results Thursday afternoon. And I'll let you all know if my ET will be Sunday (day3) or Tuesday (day5).

Hope you're all looking forward to Fall as much as I am :)

Let the games begin

2010-08-29T22:22:00.002-04:00

Today is CD 1 of this IVF cycle. I finished my BCP's Wednesday night and I started spotting last night (Saturday). Luckily it was the very last day of our two week vacation. I'll write more about our vacation later...I'm tired and heading to bed. I have an appt at 10:45 am tomorrow with the IVF nurses for u/s and b/w. They'll call me in the afternoon with what shots I'll need to start tomorrow night.

Good-night ladies :)

IVF Protocol

2010-08-09T15:31:00.004-04:00

I just spoke with my RE nurse and she said I'll be doing a microdose Lupron protocol. I've never done it before, but from what I read the Lupron doesn't start until I'm done with the BCP's. And it's a much lower dose than the long lupron protocol. Less Lurpon is good for me...I'd love to avoid the headaches and clouded-head feeling that comes with that drug.

I've never met this nurse before and so far I'm not a fan. She was too quick and didn't explain anything to me. I'll have to call back in a day or two to talk to one of the other nurses that I like to get all of my questions answered.

In case you haven't heard...the very first IVF baby born in the US (28 years ago) just had her first baby. She had a little boy and she conceived and delivered "the normal way" as she put it. Another poster said she'd wished the woman used any other word but "normal". But I can kind of see how she'd like to say something in her life was "normal" after all the attention she's gotten in her life because of how she was conceived. Anyway, it's great to know that IVF babies can/will go on in their lives to be proud parents. I hope EJ's life is at the least "normal" but I'd rather it be "extraordinary".

EJ is doing great. He's having a great summer swimming almost daily in my parents' pool. We're eating lots of ice cream too :) He's a super picky eater. He won't try anything new. He'll eat a ton of his favorites, but I really wish he'd try more "big people" food. He can't live forever on the jarred baby stuff and grilled cheese. LOL.

I've been terrible at taking pictures ever since he started walking. It's just to hard to keep a camera close by when we're running all over the house. Here are a few I've managed to take over the past few months...

Whiplash

2010-08-04T15:56:00.002-04:00

I'm not exactly sure what just happened. I called my RE to say today is CD1 (AF arrived soon after my last post) and that we'd like to move to IVF. He said great...come in tomorrow for your baseline and we'll get you started on BCP's. I told him we'll be away for vacation at the end of this month and he said no problem, he'll give me two packs of pills so I can continue them while I'm away. The day after I get back I'll go in for more b/w and u/s. I already have a projected ER - 9/12. HOLY CRAP.

Now, I just hope Ed is ok with jumping into this so quickly. We'd assumed that we'd have an extra month to prepare for it. Plus, my RE's office will be closed in October so it's either now, or I start the pills in Nov with ER in Dec...not sure I'd like to wait that long.

RE also told me he would cut the costs since we're paying OOP. I'll get those details from him a little closer to ER.

Wow. Just wow. I really hope Ed doesn't put the kibosh on this. LOL.

12 dpiui

2010-08-04T10:15:00.001-04:00

The brown spotting has stopped. Should I test or just wait for AF on Friday??

If this fails, we've decided to move ahead with IVF. We figured that we'd spend a lot of money on IUI cycles, and we don't have a very good record of them working for us. So we thought our best best is still IVF. We'll have to work out the finances of it all, but one of my very favorite (knocked up) people has already said she'd donate her leftover meds to me :) xoxo to her!

10 dpiui

2010-08-02T22:15:00.001-04:00

Brown spotting.

Haven't POAS yet, but DAMMIT.

This feels like the beginning of the end.

IUI#1 (take 2)

2010-07-28T15:10:00.003-04:00

We had our first IUI for baby #2 on Friday. It all went smoothly on my end, but DH's end could have been better. His count was only 400,000. We had the on-call RE and he said that the cut off is usually around 800,000, but he's seen IUI success with 300,000. So we did it anyway, but we're not too hopeful. I've said the mantra "it only takes 1" and I know that, but I'm still not planning on getting a BFP. Instead I'm planning a trip with DH to the urologist in a few weeks. Depending on what is found there, I'm sure we'll have to think about IVF again. The sucky part is that we have new insurance as of 8/1 and we have ZERO coverage for IF. Not even bloodwork or u/s that have always been covered before. And certainly no coverage for IUI. So that would be a waste of time and money to keep trying that route. Instead we'll have to investigate if we can get any kind of discount for the IVF cycle and see if I can find some donated meds.

In the end, baby #2 now seems like a dying dream and I'm going to have to come to terms with that some day. It just doesn't make sense for us to eat into our savings when we have EJ to take care of. If it was just the two of us, then we'd make sacrifices all over the place, but we're not sacrificing anything for EJ's sake.

Please keep us in your prayers that we find our way through this mess (once again).

Oh, I'm not exactly sure when I'll test, but it would probably be Friday 8/6 at the latest if AF doesn't show up before then. Luckily we have a dollar store around here so I can POAS and get my BFN for only a buck. LOL.

Hysteroscopy #2

2010-07-14T16:05:00.002-04:00

This hysteroscopy wasn't nearly as bad as my first one. It was over in about 7 minutes. Aside from some cramping, there wasn't too much pain either. My RE said my uterus "looks like nobody has even been in there". Kind of an odd thing to say, but I get what he means...nothing residual after my last pregnancy with EJ.

CD 14 is Thursday 7/22 and it's my appt for an u/s to decide when our IUI will be. I'm back on Clomid and getting serious night sweats and mild headaches. In general I've been bummed to start this process all over again, but it got worse when we found out our insurance coverage is changing 8/1. Nothing IF related will be covered. Luckily we'll get one IUI in this month before the coverage changes. After that, it's all OOP for us. I know many are in the same sucky boat and it just blows. That makes IVF almost non-existent as a possibility for us now (not that Ed would ever want to do it again).

So, here's to hoping we get lucky on our first IUI. Seriously though, I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you. LOL.

On your mark. Get set...

2010-07-08T14:04:00.002-04:00

I had my appt with my RE on Friday and he gave me a plan. Many of you know that I thrive on "plans". They give me purpose and a sense of direction. We went over my history since I last saw him two years ago and he wanted to hear every detail of my pregnancy, delivery, and postpartum. As I type this, I am spotting and expecting AF to arrive in a day or two.

And then...

--Set up hysteroscopy for one day next week. I had one a few years ago and you can read about it HERE if you like. I'm seriously hoping it's not that uncomfortable this time.

--Clomid 100 mg days 3 & 4.
--Clomid 50 mg days 5-6-7.
--Sex for "fun" (as my RE put it) on days 1-11.
--No sex day 12.
--Sex on day 13.
--Scan on day 14.
--Day of IUI depends on what the u/s shows.

If that IUI doesn't work, then he'd like to do another HSG to be sure my tubes are clear. If they are, I guess we'll do more IUIs. If not...who knows what we'll do then.

This is one of those rare times in a TTC journey when you WANT AF to show up, and I'll bet you all $5 that she's late.

And so it begins. Again.

2010-06-09T15:30:00.004-04:00

I just called my wonderful RE to get started TTC #2. Well, technically we've been "trying" since EJ was born. We haven't had protected sex at all, and almost every month we've managed to BD during fertile days. So that makes 17 months of being unsuccessful. I'm sure you've heard the saying "once a cheater, always a cheater"...I guess I'm "once infertile, always infertile".

There wasn't an available appt for three weeks - Friday July 2 at 1pm. That will give me plenty of time to get my mind geared up that we're actually going to go through this process again. I'm not quite sure how I'll handle the BFN's every month. Will it be as hard as it was when I wasn't already a mother? I'm just not sure, but I will certainly chronicle it here for anyone who is interested.

For those who may have forgotten (and don't want to read through my long history), here is why we're infertile:

- I have LPD (leuteal phase defect). I ovulate around day 20 (which is late) and I have low progesterone.

- DH has low count (it ranged anywhere from 250,000 to a few million. For one IUI it actually got up to 44 million). He blames steroid use...DH used to be buff. LOL.

- I suffered through RPL (recurrent pregnancy loss), 3 miscarriages total, and two lost twins. It was found through the RPL blood panel that I have a blood clotting disorder called PAI-1. I sustained my pregnancy with EJ with daily Lovenox injections.

My treatment history is a total of 5 IUIs (only one BFP from them), 2 fresh IVFs, and 2 frozen transfers. We have no more snowbabies in the freezer, so we're starting from scratch again. I'll find out for sure on July 2nd, but my guess would be to start with Clomid and an IUI. DH has changed jobs so we no longer have insurance coverage for IVF. I'm not really sure that will be in our future if the IUI's don't work. And I don't know how many IUI's we'll do before we agree on stopping.

This may be a very long road, and I'd like your love and support along the way :)

Just found this picture that cracks me up!

2010-06-09T15:17:00.001-04:00

Hopefully not the first of many.

2010-04-20T14:03:00.002-04:00

Friday night was pretty eventful in our house. Well, it started out quite normally. We had dinner and I was playing with EJ while Ed did the dishes. EJ loves a new trick he learned...walking ON the couch. He cracks up when he does it and then crashes into the cushions. I discourage it as much as I can, but it really is quite cute. But not any more. EJ was laughing and bouncing around and then took an awkward bounce and went right of the edge of the couch. I caught the bottom half of him, but since he's so tall now, his little head hit the ground. He instantly started screaming and I scooped him up as fast as I could. When I put his head on my shoulder he instantly stopped crying. When I pulled him around to see if there was a bump, to my absolute horror, his body was limp and his eyes were closed. It appeared that he lost consciousness. I screamed or gasped and that got his attention enough to wake him up and he started crying again. After a few minutes he was settling down and drinking some milk.

I immediately called his pediatrician. I know from all of the baby books that if there is a bump to the head followed by passing out, it's protocol to bring them into the ER. And of course the dr told us to take him right in.

We got to the ER around 10 pm (the best Pedi-ER is about 45 mins away, and it was pouring so it took almost an hour). EJ had fallen asleep after only a few minutes of the ride. The nurses there were excellent, knowing exactly how to handle a 15-month who screamed the WHOLE time he was examined. They did an initial exam just to be sure there was no bleeding in his ears and that his eyes weren't dilated. EJ then calmed down when the nurses and intern left and we waited for the actual doctor. We were so worried he was going to need a CT scan. I'm sure many of you know the dangers of being exposed to so much radiation (80x that of an x-ray), especially with him being so small. And even worse, they would have to sedate him if they needed to do the scan. What a complete scary thought. I just felt so awful for my little guy. He was cold in his mini hospital gown (which was quite adorable) so I bundled him up under my sweatshirt. We felt so bad for him that we even let him hold the hospital's remote control, which made him so totally happy. LOL.

The doctor came in a few minutes later and checked him out. She was confident that he was just fine and didn't need the CT scan. Yeah!!!! She said she believes he had a breath-holding spell in which sometimes little ones get so upset they hold their breath and pass out. I've heard many parents say their kids did it so I know it's common. But still VERY scary.

So we packed him back up and headed home. We got in around midnight and we all slept like babies that night. I did set my alarm to wake him up at 4am per the dr's request. Just to be sure he was doing ok. EJ got up Saturday morning and was his normal cheerful self with no signs that anything happened...not even a bump on his head.

Big sighs of relief.

15 months

2010-04-01T15:18:00.003-04:00

EJ had his 15-month check-up today and he did awesome. He now weighs in at a hefty 20 lbs 10 ounces and is 32 inches long. He's grown over a foot since birth :) A few of his molars are coming (which explains a lot of the drooling and gnawing on his fingers).

He did have to get three shots, which made him cry. That just breaks my heart to see him in pain. He's such a trooper though. I had Teddy Grahams in my hand, along with his water bottle, so that helped him calm down pretty quickly.

For a few months now, his feet can touch the seat when he's in his car seat. He has pretty strong legs so he's able to bounce the entire car seat. The law is that they have to be a year old (which obviously he is) before turning around, but they also have to be 20 lbs. He was a few ounces shy of that at his 12-month check-up so I had to keep him facing back. That changed today! Yeah!!! I know it's safer to have them face the rear, but he could bounce his seat so much that it wasn't even level a few minutes into our car ride. So now it's anchored with the LATCH tethers facing forward and it doesn't budge. He also loves facing the front. And it's so much easier...we can just hand snacks/sippy cups right back to him when he gets fidgety.

So as some things get harder with age (running around to chase after him), things like longer car rides get easier as he's able to entertain himself with books or snacks.

He really is a great baby, and generally really easy. He's not the best sleeper in the world -- still doesn't sleep through the night more than 3 to 4 days a week, but that's getting better as each month passes. He's so funny and there isn't a spot on his body that isn't ticklish. He's just like his mother in that aspect :) It's so easy to get him laughing. Just sneeze or tell him he has stinky feet. For some reason he finds that HILARIOUS. He's got a quick and hot temper and he's a screamer and will instantly let you know when he's not happy. But that just usually lasts a minute or two until he finds something else to amuse him. Typically opening the refrigerator distracts him enough. It's funny how a BBQ sauce bottle can be soooo fun to a toddler. Haha.

We took him to see the Easter Bunny yesterday. While we were standing in line he wanted to crawl right over to the bunny. He couldn't get there fast enough. He was practically giggling when he got close. Then we put him on the bunny's lap and he screamed bloody murder. These little ones sure do keep you guessing!!

I guess that's it for now. I'm gonna go hug my munchkin :)

Touchy-touchy

2010-03-16T18:20:00.003-04:00

Why do people have to be soooo super sensitive? Why do they have to read into things so much? Why can't they just take a comment/compliment without scrutinizing it? Why do people have to be so gosh darn moody? You can never tell if they're going to be happy, sad, realistic, optimistic, pessimistic, etc. I hate having to "test the waters" with some people before opening my mouth.

And on a similar note...why can't people just accept people for who they are? If you know I'm sensitive about something, why get mad at me when I react accordingly? Why do you want to change/inhibit me? If you've known me for two seconds, you know I think my opinion is always right. I think very highly of my opinion. LOL. So why act so surprised when I give my two cents? I have an opinion on EVERYTHING and give it very willy-nilly. It's who I am. IT'S WHAT I DO. You should know that about me by now.

And in closing...I never mean any harm. I'm not a mean spirited person. Again, know me for two seconds and you'll know that about me. I am very sarcastic, but I'm not a mean girl. I'm actually very nice and thoughtful. I am the person who sends flowers/gifts/candy/gift baskets for any occasion. And I'm always looking for an excuse to give a cute gift. It's not me showing-off at all. I just know I like to receive cute things so I figure everyone else does too. It's really that simple.

Vent over.

Brand name or generic?

2010-03-15T15:46:00.001-04:00

Ladies, I've been out of the OPK loop for quite some time. Recommend your favorite one!

OPK's here I come

2010-03-07T22:15:00.002-05:00

Ed and were sitting on the floor tonight playing with EJ and watching some TV. OUT OF THE CLEAR BLUE he starts this conversation:

Him: So, do you know when you'll be ovulating this month?
Me: (baffled) Not really, I'm trying not to pay attention to the dates in my cycles so I don't get overly obsessed about things since we're not TTC yet.
Him: Oh, well, why don't you pay attention this month?
Me: You mean like with OPK's and that kind of stuff??
Him: Yes.
Me: GASP!

I'm sure you can imagine that immediately my stomach flip-flopped at the thought of this, but once it settled I was overcome with excitement. Although, as I sit here alone in the dark I'm convincing myself that it's totally pointless and a waste of money. That I know in my head we'd need to do IVF (or at LEAST do a few IUI's) for us to get PG again. But for some reason my old hopeful ways are pushing through and I'm thinking wouldn't it be great if we could be one of those lucky couples who needed to go through hell to have their first child but then went on to get KTFU all on their own for the second (third, fourth) child???

And just as a little extra news fodder, I just learned this weekend that my Dad's cousin tried for six years to get pregnant. Then all of a sudden it worked and they went on to have four children in seven years. That is one trait I'd like to see run in our family. LOL.

One foot in front of the other

2010-03-02T15:44:00.004-05:00

I have experienced one of the biggest thrills a new Mom anticipates...EJ took his first few steps!!!

Before any of you think it, yes I know he's a little on the late side. His cousin is 3.5 months younger and her first steps where a few days ago. But he's still in the "normal" range so there was nothing to be concerned about.

Those 5 steps were very wobbly, but he walked right into my arms :) He'd much rather crawl for now since he can get places so much faster doing it that way, but I'm sure it won't be long until he is running around the house. I'll feel better when he's more sturdy, but until then I'm counting on the occasional bump and bruise as he figures it all out.

And I don't think I've ever posted about his "wide" vocabulary...
Up
Cup
Mom mom mom mom (he goes on forever LOL)
Apple
And I swear he can say yogurt :)

He's learning to wave good-bye, but in my opinion it looks more like he's milking a cow. Does anyone remember the kid (little Jack??) in Meet the Fockers doing that????

And he's learned how to get down from the couch feet first, so now every time he's getting changed he tries to back off of the changing table. YIKES!

Finally, on a personal note, I had my yearly check-up this morning. It was the first time in a full year I've had to drop my pants at a doctors' appt. Hard to imagine I did that hundreds of times from 2006 - 2009. I don't miss it at all.

Just some cuteness...

My little guy climbed up all by himself..scary!

Bed-ridden

2010-02-21T18:59:00.003-05:00

All of a sudden after dinner Thursday night my nose got really stuffy and my throat started to hurt. That is how all of my colds start so I figured that was what was coming.

Wrong.

I woke up Friday morning feeling really terrible. My head hurt and was very congested and my throat felt like it was in fire. I had plans with my Mom to go out for the day with EJ, but since I was feeling awful I was in no mood for a day at the mall (yes, I was THAT sick). So she took him (God bless her) and I chilled at home on the couch for the day. I felt worse and worse as each hour passed. She called after lunch and said she'd keep EJ until Ed got home from work. Awesome. Back to sleep. Ed brought pizza home around 5:30, I scarfed that down and then went right to bed. EJ would have been whining for me if he'd seen me, so it's easier to avoid that whole scene.

And I stayed in bed all weekend. Except for my trip to the dr. where I found out I had an upper respiratory infection. And let's toss in ear and sinus infections just to round things out. She prescribed antibiotics, cough medicine with codeine (YEAH!!) and Mucinex DM. Have you ever tried Mucinex? I works really well at loosening up mucous in your sinuses. And your crotch. For those of you still "in the trenches" of IF and in need of increasing CM, Mucinex is your friend. I needed a pantyliner this morning. LOL.

I started feeling better when I woke up today (Sunday), and I'm feeling even more normal this evening. Hopefully I'll be ready for our normal playing routine tomorrow.

I do have to say Ed has been wonderful ever since he walked in the door Friday evening. I have not heard one single cry out of EJ, and I'm jealous of all the laughing I hear. I can't even make EJ laugh like that! Ed has brought me all my meals in bed, and when I peaked earlier today the downstairs wasn't even a mess. We've called/texted each other so EJ doesn't hear my voice and he answers each call with "Hello and thank you for calling Big Ed's Catering Service. How may we assist you?" So he is even keeping his sense of humor through all of this.

He deserves some lovin' after I feel better :)

EJ's first class

2010-02-17T14:22:00.003-05:00

Today was EJ's first day of class at Gym.boree. For those of you who don't know what it is, it's a cute little class where the kids can play, sing, climb and explore. There is a "teacher" who leads the class in activities and keeps some sort of focus so there aren't seven munchkins just running around aimlessly.

Everyone in the class was super friendly and very excited to meet us. EJ was the second boy, so the mom of the first one was very glad that it wouldn't just be girls anymore. We took off our shoes and headed over to the gym mat. All the others were playing with toys and having fun. And EJ was stuck on me like super glue. For-the-entire-45-minute-class. He would claw at my sweater if I tried to put him down.

I got reassurance that it was common and in a few classes he'd be exploring with the rest of them. I was a bit surprised because I've never seen him act like this before. He may start out that way at my IL's, but usually after 10 minutes or so he's opening up. I guess he was just too overwhelmed today. At least we only signed up for one month at a time. Haha.

New plan of action

2010-02-12T20:38:00.000-05:00

We have decided to wait to talk about having a second child until at least May. That will give me/us a few months to get our heads around that idea for many reasons...

Struggling to get PG again. What if an IUI doesn't work?
Deciding if I could handle suffering through another loss (God forbid!).
Do I want to put myself through the emotional stress of worrying EVERY DAY about a viable pregnancy (obviously I would rent another doppler. LOL.)
Do I want to go through the physical trials of a pregnancy (I got sick almost every day)?

I don't need a few more months. I know the answer is that I would move heaven and earth to give EJ a little brother or sister. Ok, so we'll wait until May so that Ed can get his bonus which will help pay for IF treatments. I guess the better reason would be to say that in those few months I will have to prepare myself for the struggles of IF cycles and the possible (God forbid!) fourth, fifth, etc. miscarriage.

In the meantime...we've decided to sell our house. We won't move far, just "upgrade" to a bigger/nicer home. And to get away from the complete @ssholes that live next door.

So, what's new with yall?

Putting the wheels in motion. Maybe.

2010-01-26T15:26:00.003-05:00

I'm sure this post will rub some of you the wrong way as you're still hoping and praying for your first miracle. And for that I get it if you have nothing good to say to me right now. Really, I understand.

EJ is now past the year mark and we're starting to think about if/when we want to have another child. We couldn't afford another IVF (and we don't have any snowbabies left) but we are considering IUI's. I'm still not totally positive I'm ready to go through that again, and the possible loss that might follow a BFP...I am a "habitual aborter" after all. We haven't used any form of contraception in the past year, so here I am again finding myself the living definition of infertility...12 consecutive months of TTC without a BFP. Yup, I'm still broken.

I have heard COUNTLESS times in the past year of so-and-so who did IVF for their first child, or adopted, and then suddenly got PG on their own. I know we've all heard that over and over again. And it still irks me. I don't think I'm as bitter as I was before EJ, but to be honest it still makes me twitch when I hear "just relax and it will happen".

So in a nutshell I guess I'm just playing tug-of-war with myself. Some days I think we should go for it, and other days I think I must be crazy for wanting to put myself through that again (and so soon). If there is anyone out there who has thoughts on this, hypothetical or practical, please share them.

Birthday Boy!

2010-01-20T16:06:00.004-05:00

Since EJ was getting over being sick on his actual bday, we pushed his party to the following weekend. He wasn't a huge fan of his chocolate cake on the 1st, so we did a birthday corn muffin for his party...which he licked up every little crumb!

He was spoiled with gifts and lots of love :)

Here are pictures from his actual birthday and his party.

Christmas Pictures

2010-01-07T15:51:00.013-05:00

Here are some pictures from EJ's first Christmas morning and some other random cuteness ;)

EJ looooves to read...

EJ's favorite gift was the shower back-scrubber I got Ed...

EJ found Jimmy's doggie door...

EJ and Daddy sound asleep...

A Year in the Life

2010-01-01T00:01:00.008-05:00

HAPPY 1st BIRTHDAY EJ!!!!!
You are the most wonderful thing that has happened to us. We love you more each day and we're so lucky and proud to have you as our son! Love, Mommy & Daddy xoxox

One of my favorite songs from the musical "Rent" inspired this post...

525,600 minutes, 525,000 moments so dear.
525,600 minutes - how do you measure, measure a year?
In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee.
In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife.
In 525,600 minutes - how do you measure a year in the life?
It’s time now to sing out, tho the story never ends let's celebrate remember a year in the life!

How would I measure the past year?
5000+ baby wipes used
2200 diaper changes
2200 bottles/meals prepared
1500 hours spent rocking my baby
1000+ outfit changes
365 midnight feedings
185 3am feedings
100+ loads of laundry
50 canisters of formula
40 boxes of diapers
2 vacations this year...1 to TX and 1 to NC
1 moment frozen in time when he said "Ma!" for the first time
Countless smiles and giggles that melt my heart daily :)

This has been the best year of my life. I cannot wait to see what the future holds for EJ and us as a family. It's hard to say it, but I don't have a "baby" anymore...I have a "toddler". There is a whole world out there waiting for EJ to explore and it's going to be so exciting to see it all through his eyes.

365 Days Ago...

2009-12-31T14:30:00.002-05:00

My world as I knew it was about to change! Click here to see my post from New Year's Eve 2008.

I cannot believe my little man will be one year old tomorrow. This year has gone super fast. You know how before your wedding everyone says how quickly the day will go? You just shrug it off until it's actually your wedding day and it goes by at lightning speed. Well, EJ's first year has been even quicker than that.

We were going to have a birthday party for him tomorrow but he was sick all last night (from both ends) so we will have to postpone till next weekend. I think my parents will still come over for a mini-celebration tomorrow...one is never too sick for ice cream and cake if you ask me or my mom :D

Today is my brother's birthday and he always loved having his bday on New Year's Eve. He was always at a great party. Although this is the first for him being a dad so I'm sure it will be much more low-key than years past. LOL.

I hope you all have a wonderful and safe night. I know many of you are glad to see 2009 end. And I'm praying that 2010 is much kinder to you.

May all your new year's dreams come true.

EJ's first Christmas

2009-12-27T21:39:00.006-05:00

I will post some pictures in a day or so, but I wanted to jot down a recap before I forgot anything.

In a nutshell, this was the best Christmas of my life.
(And certainly better than last year where I was on bedrest).

We spend Christmas Eve with my family, and Christmas Day with my in-laws so we didn't have to split the holiday.

Ed had to work a half day on Christmas Eve so EJ and I had our normal weekday routine until Ed got home. Then we went to my parents where we were the first to arrive. I was really happy about that since EJ could "open" his presents with our full attention :D My parents got him a beautiful handmade rocking horse. EJ is more interested in playing with the leather straps than actually rocking on it, but I'm sure he'll like that as he gets a bit bigger. They also got him some cute clothes, the Little People Farm, and some other small toys. Then we opened "The Night Before Christmas". My parents got all of their grandchildren that this year and it's a true keepsake. It's from Hallmark and they recorded their voices on each page reading the book. So, EJ will always have his Mom-Mom and Pop read him that story on Christmas Eve. I just love it.

My parents got Ed the usual...lawn service for the summer and some other odds and ends. They got me a netbook and a bunch of clohtes from the LOFT, a garnet Pandora charm (that is EJ's birthstone) among other small things. My Mom always gets me comfy socks, nail polish and mascara.

Then the rest of my family arrived and EJ was spoiled even more. My niece and nephew got him a Build-a-Bear with their voices recorded on it. It scared him a bit so we'll save that one till he's a bit older. Haha.

Then we had wonderful food and everyone was full of good cheer :)

Ed and I went home and put EJ to bed and then got to play Santa for the first time. It was awesome. We spent about an hour putting toys together and arranging them under the tree. I know EJ had no clue what was going on, so it was more for us as new parents than it was for our little man. Nonetheless it was still fun.

Christmas morning Ed got up with EJ, but I couldn't sleep so I ran downstairs (like a kid) and we had our first Christmas morning as our little family. EJ spent the whole time playing with a back-scratcher that I got Ed while Ed and I opened our gifts. I got him all the "manly" things he wanted...food dehydrator, tackle box, camo jacket, skull cap and Family Guy on DVD. He got me the Tiffany Bead bracelet, new perfume, a movie, the Pink CD and my favorite gift---a Belgian waffle maker! I was so excited. They are my favorite and I've wanted that for years. We had them yesterday morning for breakfast and they were perfect :)

Christmas afternoon we went to my in-laws for an early dinner. The food was awesome and EJ was having fun with his cousins, well mostly just his one cousin. She is 11 years old, but she has the mind of a 30 year old. She will be the perfect Mommy some day. She is so good with EJ and he's so happy to have her attention.

We weren't there too late so we could get EJ to bed after two very exciting days. We came home and snuggled on the couch and soon went to bed ourselves.

So I guess that is it for now. Oh, and we got a call yesterday that Ed's cousin and his wife(who TTC for almost 2 years with a bunch of IUI's) are 2 months pregnant! What an awsome Christmas gift for them.

Makes me want to think about trying for another :)

11 months (and 12 days) old...

2009-12-13T17:00:00.006-05:00

I remember when he used to just sit still when I took this picture every month.

Everything's better with snow!

2009-12-08T16:34:00.002-05:00

Ho Ho Ho

2009-11-30T18:07:00.004-05:00

We visited Santa today!! And this was the only picture where EJ was not "actively crying" as the photographer so eloquently put it.

And this is going to be the picture on our Christmas card this year.

Getting even bigger!

2009-11-13T07:36:00.001-05:00

Happy Halloween!!

2009-11-02T11:19:00.008-05:00

EJ was Nemo for his very first Halloween!

Here is EJ with his "berry" cute cousin Ella!

Poor girl, she just wanted to hug him...

This month's photo shoot

2009-10-17T14:40:00.007-04:00

How many shots does it take to get a good one???

FINALLY!!!

Poor Jimmy

2009-10-16T08:42:00.003-04:00

EJ has become quite mobile these days. Whether he's in his walker zooming around the kitchen or doing the army crawl across the floor, Jimmy keeps alert.

And yesterday I found him hiding behind the couch...

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

2009-10-15T12:57:00.002-04:00

Thinking of all of my "sisters" today -

I am wearing a pair of shoes.
They are ugly shoes.
Uncomfortable shoes.
I hate my shoes.
Each day I wear them, and each day I wish I had another pair.
Some days my shoes hurt so bad that I do not think I can take another step.
Yet, I continue to wear them.
I get funny looks wearing these shoes.
They are looks of sympathy.
I can tell in others eyes that they are glad they are my shoes and not theirs.
They never talk about my shoes.
To learn how awful my shoes are might make them uncomfortable.
To truly understand these shoes you must walk in them.
But, once you put them on, you can never take them off.
I now realize that I am not the only one who wears these shoes.
There are many pairs in this world.
Some women ache daily as they try and walk in them.
Some have learned how to walk in them so they don't hurt quite as much.
Some have worn the shoes so long that days will go by before they think about how much they hurt.
No woman deserves to wear these shoes.
Yet, because of these shoes I am a stronger woman.
These shoes have given me the strength to face anything.
They have made me who I am.
I will forever walk in the shoes of a woman who has lost a child.

Vote for EJ!!!

2009-10-04T20:50:00.004-04:00

Vote here!

9 months

2009-10-02T07:41:00.004-04:00

EJ turned 9 months old yesterday :) I can't believe how quickly time is going by. He's growing a ton and his personality is really coming through more every day. He's got such a sense of humor and he just loves to be tickled. When we stop he looks at us like, "hey, keep going!"

His four front teeth are here and the next two top ones are poking through now. We've started him on "finger foods" but he hasn't had any interest in them yet. So for now I'll just keep putting them in front of him and one day they'll venture into his mouth.

Unfortunately EJ had his first cold and fever last week. He was such a sad-sack. His nose was so stuffy and runny and he just wanted to be cuddled. It only lasted two days but it took him another day or two to get back to his normal playful self.

I'm loving all the time I get to spend with EJ but it is certainly making him a mama's boy. Ed was the same with his mom so I was warned by my MIL to expect it. He's fine playing with anyone else as long as he can't see me. But as soon as he does he shouts "MMMMAAAA!!!!" and put his arms out for me to take him. We're trying to phase him out of that (with no luck), but quite a few moms have told me he may do that for a few years. I do have to admit that I secretly LOVE that I'm his favorite person :)

Well, it's time to scarf down some lunch before he wakes up and it's playtime again!

Here's a few pictures from last month...

Teeth!

2009-09-18T12:25:00.000-04:00

There are two on the bottom and one is starting to poke through on top!

Lots of fun with picture pages...

2009-09-10T11:28:00.013-04:00

Here are some cute pictures from our trip to Texas (that's Katie, not me) and to the beach in NC.

[picture of katie's butt removed :D]

EJ and my Mom having fun in the sun!

Sharing a beer with my brother...

Back to reality

2009-09-08T12:40:00.003-04:00

Hello all my lovlies. I know it's been quite some time since I posted but we were on vacation! I was home for a week after my trip to Texas and then I packed up EJ and we headed to the beach in Duck, NC for two weeks. Ed joined us for the second week and we just got home this weekend.

It was EJ's first experience with sand and he did NOT like it. Luckily the house we rented had an exersaucer that we used at the beach. EJ loved that! We had a very relaxing time sitting on the beach and going in the pool. We went out to dinner a few times, but mostly hung out at the house with my family. My parents were there and so were my 2 brothers and their families. It was so wonderful to have my niece and nephew there (almost-7 and 9 years old) to be entertainment for EJ all that time. I still have to upload all of my pictures but I will post them as soon as I can.

And onto more important news...EJ has two little teeth! They popped in a few days apart but both bottom teeth are now perfectly in place. I think he started drooling/gnawing back in June so we've been waiting quite a while for them to pop through.

Well I'm still unpacking and doing laundry so I will have to post more details and photos later. I just wanted to check in to see how y'all are doing. What's new with everyone?

EJ's first look at the ocean (at 6:15 am):

I <3 Texas!

2009-08-16T21:57:00.002-04:00

EJ and I had a wonderful trip to Texas. We also took my Mom with us to join the fun. Our flight left Tuesday morning and EJ was an angel the whole time. He looked around at all the people and smiled and played with his toys the entire 4.5 hour flight.

We got into Dallas at 2pm and Happy Hour Katie and her mom Patty met us at the airport. It was so great to see those smiling faces! We got settled into our hotel and they took us to an awesome place for dinner in Arlington...Tan's Mongolian Grill. It's really cool - you go through a buffet and fill your bowls with all the meat, fish, veggies and noodles you want. Then you add different sauces to get the flavor you want. You then bring it to the cook who puts it on a giant grill and adds an egg to it. Presto! Your meal is done, and quite yummy!

On Wednesday we went to the Dallas Aquarium. We met up with Fertile Rambler Kristin and she brought her niece and nephew too. That was an awesome time. It was so amazing to meet her in person. I know she posted the same thing, but it felt like I was meeting an old friend, like I've known her forever. And as if it's even possible, she's even funnier in person!

That night we went out for a great Italian dinner. EJ was a bit overly tired so I spent most of my meal comforting him. I don't mind one bit and cutting chicken is now something I can do with one hand. LOL.

Thursday we went to the Stockyards in Ft. Worth to see the Longhorns. They're enormous. Katie took great pictures all week so I'll post them once she sends them my way. We found this great spice shop and got some spices, flavored sugars and teas. And of course we went souvenir shopping. We had some real Mexican food for lunch, which was delicious. I just wish I had gotten dessert...next time I will ;)

Katie's dad brought home dinner that night and it was yummy Texas BBQ...brisket, chicken, ribs and the yummiest rolls. Have any of you ever heard of Blue Bell ice cream? Apparently it's so good that Katie doesn't share, but she was nice enough to share her Pecan Praline with us. It was heavenly!

Friday was a really fun day. We picked up Kristin and headed to Southfork Ranch. You know, where the show Dallas was filmed. It's my Mom's favorite show so she was really excited. It was actually pretty cool to see. Then Kristin suggested a place for lunch called Love & War in Texas. They ordered deep-fried pickles (gross!) and loved them. I stuck to the deep-fried green beans. Kristin suggested that we all order chicken-fried steak. I had never had it before but Ed really likes it so I thought I'd give it a try. Oh.my.word.it.is.delicious. I could have eaten two of them.

We then brought Kristin home and we got to meet her hubby and her three dogs. I'm sure you've seen pictures of Steve and he is just as sweet in person!! He is a licker and almost knocked me over with his strong tongue...any lady-dog would be lucky to have him! LOL. That night we all went to Patty's for a BBQ. Kristin brought her DH and a bunch of Katie's friends were there. Everyone is Texas is so stinking nice!!

Saturday morning Katie and Patty took us to the airport and sent us on our way. I miss Texas already, but it's great to be home with Ed and snuggle up in bed with him. EJ slept most of today, but I'm sure he misses all those ladies loving on him :)

Oh and before I forget, thank you Kristin for not babynapping EJ. He's teething and seriously needs his Mama :)

Picture People - 7 months

2009-08-04T16:34:00.003-04:00

I'm so in love :-)

My weekend

2009-07-27T16:51:00.002-04:00

We had quite a busy weekend in our household. Exhausting, but so much fun. Saturday night Ed and I went out with Happy Hour Katie and her hubby Mike (this was the first time meeting the husbands). We met at the new Sands Casino in Bethlehem, PA. We had a great time. We had to wait 1.5 hrs for our table for dinner, so we sat in another bar and had drinks and chatted. I was having such a good time and the wait just flew by. Then we went in for dinner at an Irish Pub and my meal was awesome - stuffed pork chops with bleu cheese mashed potatoes...yumm-o! There were also two men on guitars playing Irish songs (which I love) so that made it even better in my opinion.

After dinner the men went back to the bar and Katie and I hit the penny slots. I've never played them before (I'm a craps kinda girl) and it was fun. I won $27.04 so that made it even better. That money will go right into my trip-to-Texas fund! Oh, and I'm hoping Katie will post a picture of us...the good picture of our faces...the first picture that Mike took was of our chests. I guess Mike is a boob-man ;)

While all of this fun was going on, EJ was having fun of his own sleeping over my parents' house. I missed him all night, but thanks to the vodka drinks I had I slept like a baby all night. When I woke up I called my Mom and EJ was still asleep so she said there was time for Ed and me to go out to breakfast. It took a while with the Sunday churchgoers everywhere so by the time we got back to my Mom's EJ was back asleep again. So Ed and I ran a few errands and EJ was finally awake when we got back to the house. Then we hung out and swam in the pool and stayed for dinner. We got home around 8pm last night and we were all pooped. All three of us slept very well and EJ was happy when he got up today ready to play the day away with his Mommy <3!

Giveaway!

2009-07-27T16:14:00.001-04:00

Check out today's Giveaway from The Mrs!!!

CLICK HERE!

What just happened here??

2009-07-24T07:08:00.003-04:00

EJ woke up around 6:30 on this rainy Friday morning. He had been asleep all night so I was well-rested and ready to enjoy a morning of barley cereal and playing on the floor. I changed his diaper and return him to his crib with his music on so I can get a few things done first. I brush my teeth, wash up and get dressed. He's kicking away and having fun. Then I run down the hall to put a load of laundry in. He's still happy and cooing away so I sneak in to check my email and update FB and Twitter.

Then all is quite in his bedroom. No more music and no more cooing. So of course I wonder what is up so I quickly walk in there.

My little man has rolled onto his belly and GONE TO SLEEP!!!!! There are two things that amaze me about this. 1) He just woke up after 9 hours of sleep so how could he be tired? 2) He has NEVER just gone to sleep by himself like that. I am one of those terrible mothers who holds my baby until he's fast asleep and then I gently put him into his crib.

Wow. Just wow.

EJ loves that he can hold is head up so well now...

My butt is out of gear.

2009-07-22T11:06:00.002-04:00

I need to get my butt in gear and lose a few pounds. Honestly I could lose about 40 lbs, but let's just start with a "few" for now.

What do you ladies do for exercise?

We have a treadmill in our basement collecting dust and Ed uses his Total Gym, but it looks scary to me.

Actually, I think the better question to ask is how do you ladies get going on your exercise routine? I will do a few miles on my treadmill for a few days the first week and then I lose interest and suddenly a month has passed and I haven't stepped another food on it.

I can schedule the time to do it but then the time comes and I create a dozen other things I'd rather be doing.

What keeps you motivated?

6-month appt

2009-07-14T11:35:00.003-04:00

EJ weighed in at a hefty 15 lbs 6 oz yesterday. He's gained a full 10 lbs in the short six months of his life. He's also up to 26.5 inches (he started at 19"). He also got one oral (which he loves) and two IM vaccines yesterday. My poor fellow cried, but it didn't last too long. I've gotten smart at these appts and always have a toy ready to distract him.

I've decided to switch pediatricians. There have been a few things over the six months that have bothered me. Each one is something small, but when you add them up they're reason enough for me to leave. A few friends gave me the name of another doctor they love. Not only do they say he's great with their kids, but apparently he's a hottie. Like hot enough that one friend's DH insists on going to the appts with her. LOL.

And more big new...we've booked a trip to Texas next month! We're going to see Happy Hour Katie, her mom Patty and Fertile Rambler Kristin. I'm bringing EJ and my Mom is coming along too. I CANNOT WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And here is a daily dose of EJ cuteness that this proud mommy wants to share :)

The better to eat you with, my dear.

2009-07-09T17:53:00.002-04:00

They haven't come through yet, but EJ's teeth are on their way! I can see the tiny little pearly whites just under his bottom gums. He's been drooling for weeks so they should pop through any time now.

Now this will make gnawing on Mommy's fingers out of the question. LOL.

This is NOT EJ's mouth, but this is what it looks like -- only both of his bottom front's are visible.

Getting so big

2009-07-09T10:52:00.001-04:00

He looks like a little man...

6 months

2009-07-01T17:51:00.004-04:00

I can believe my little man is 6 months old already!!

EJ is doing great. He loves his cereal and eats all of his veggies. Sweet potatoes are his favorite though. And we start fruit this weekend. I'm sure that will be a big hit. He's rolling from his back to his belly and is great at holding his head up when he's on his belly. He smiles when you smile at him and lets out great belly laughs when tickled. He's a very ticklish little one, just like his Mommy.

Oh and the best part...he's saying "ma"!!! For a while he said it randomly, but today he looked right at me and said it. And then when Ed said "where's Mommy?" he looked at me. Commence my heart to melt into a big mushy pile of goo. Ah that makes me smile just thinking about it.

EJ found his feet a few weeks ago. Yay for something else to suck on that can't be dropped causing my peanut to cry!

EJ is even laughing at Jimmy now and reaching out to touch him. Jimmy has no idea that in the near future EJ will be chasing him around pulling his tail and ears. But for now they snuggle up together as cute as can be.

I have to upload EJ's "watch me grow" picture but here is a cute one (or two) to hold you over until then :)

Lunch Date

2009-06-27T11:01:00.002-04:00

I had a very special lunch date this past Wednesday. "Happy Hour" Katie and her mom Patty came over to spend some time with me and EJ. I have told my Mom so much about them that she wanted to have lunch with us too. It was so much fun. They are two of the sweetest women I have ever met. I've "known" Patty in the blogosphere for over a year now so it was great to meet her in person. I met Katie for lunch one day last month so we are old friends by now :)

They are so generous with EJ. They brought him a Build-a-Bear named Big Tex (they're from TX). He had on a t-shirt with the Texas flag on it, jeans, and high-top sneakers. And he also had a change of clothes that were little plaid shorts with a golf shirt. Way too cute!!! They also brought EJ a cool bathing suit with matching t-shirt, Hawaiian shirt and little sandals. I can't wait to see him in it...and of course I'll post pictures!

Katie brought Harley with them. She is one of the cutest little faces I have ever seen. At first Jimmy was being snarky with her, but she soon just rolled over and let him sniff her goods and then they were fine. Yes, Katie's dog is easy. LOL. Before we knew it, Harley was the one chasing Jimmy around. They ran around the house and yard until they tired each other out. Many dog owners know that "a tired dog is a good dog" so I always love it when Jimmy is pooped. If I can figure out how to load my video to youtube I can post it so you can see EJ cracking up at the two dogs wrestling.

We all just sat around chatting and having a nice visit. Oh, and Katie taught me how to knit. I'm SUPER slow but getting better every day. Hopefully Katie or Patty can post the pictures they took. I love that I can now say they're my friends "IRL".

Ed's First Father's Day

2009-06-22T09:55:00.003-04:00

Ed had a great day yesterday. It started out with me making him the breakfast he requested...chocolate chip pancakes (that was a first for him) and corned beef hash (yuck). He ate every bite. Then he opened our gifts. I got him a Life is Good mug and a wrench set. Ed believes no Father's Day is complete without someone receiving a tool of sorts. LOL. And EJ gave him a picture of the two of them in a frame that says "Daddy and Me". It was so cute to see Ed scoop up EJ and thank him for helping him celebrate his first Father's Day.

We hung out around the house for a bit and then went to my parents' house. My brother, SIL and new niece were there and I wished my brother a Happy First Father's Day too. He was all a-glow. My Dad was so happy to have us all there with him.

I don't think Ed realized how much Father's Day would mean to him until it actually happened. He loved us making a fuss over him and was palling-around with EJ all day. It was too precious.

I hope all the Dad's in your lives had a great day and I'm praying everyone's husbands are Daddy's by this day next year.

Boobies.

2009-06-16T14:11:00.004-04:00

Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I hope I haven't lost all of your interest.

This post is going to be about boobies. And not just any boobies. My boobies. They were perfect when Ed and I met. He will tell you honestly that they are one (er, two) of the reasons that he fell in love with me. They were the perfect size for my frame. They stood at attention. They were full and gorgeous. If I was a boob-man, I would love me for them.

Then I put on the infamous weight that many of us IF'ers put on. And they got a bit larger. Ed still loved them, but I felt they were one cup size too big for me. I think they made me look heavier than I actually was and they made button-up shirts almost impossible to look nice on me.

And then I got pregnant and they nearly took over my body. They were still full and lovely, but now about TWO sizes too big for my liking.

And then I breastfed.

And they now are closer to my feet than my chin. LOL. What happened to them??? Will they stay like this forever??? They are like water balloons with all the weight at the bottom. Only, they are like "empty" if that makes any sense. As I said before, they were "full". And now to squeeze them there is nothing left inside. Where did it all go????

I want my pretty boobies back. If they don't come back on their own (with the help of diet and exercise) by the time I'm 40 (and no chance of having any more children) I'm going to take care of things Dr. 90210 style. Don't get me wrong, it was TOTALLY worth it for EJ, but man do I miss feeling pretty when I'm nekkid.

My Snowbaby...

2009-06-09T14:40:00.001-04:00

EJ had his 5-month check-up today and all is good!
He's now 14 lbs 4 oz and 25.25 inches long...getting so big!!

5 MINUTE CHOCOLATE MUG CAKE

2009-06-08T15:18:00.002-04:00

4 tablespoons flour
4 tablespoons sugar
2 tablespoons cocoa
1 egg
3 tablespoons milk
3 tablespoons oil
3 tablespoons chocolate chips (optional)
A small splash of vanilla extract
1 large coffee mug (MicroSafe)

Add dry ingredients to mug, and mix well. Add the egg and mix thoroughly.

Pour in the milk and oil and mix well..

Add the chocolate chips (if using) and vanilla extract, and mix again.
Put your mug in the microwave and cook for 3 minutes at 1000 watts.

The cake will rise over the top of the mug, but don't be alarmed!

Allow to cool a little, and tip out onto a plate if desired.
EAT ! (this can serve 2 if you want to feel slightly more virtuous).

And why is this the most dangerous cake recipe in the world?
Because now we are all only 5 minutes away from chocolate cake at any time of the day or night!